


my love's too big for you.

by queenieface



Category: Naruto
Genre: Angst, Gen, Nebulous Timeline, Slight fluff, but slight AU, friendship fic, i just see sai and naruto as bffs, mentioned Sakura/Naruto, no Sakura bashing though, possible ooc, set somewhere in canon universe
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-11-19
Updated: 2016-11-19
Packaged: 2018-08-31 20:47:03
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,330
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/8593126
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/queenieface/pseuds/queenieface
Summary: Naruto had always loved Sakura. He just loved Sasuke more.--In which Sai is a good listener, even when Naruto isn't sure what to say.





	

**Author's Note:**

> I hereby disclaim all characters in this little one shot - especially the two who find time to listen. Naruto and all other characters belong to Masashi Kishimoto and anyone else who has a claim. All I have is the plot bunny!

When Sai makes his way to the tea house where he normally meets Naruto for their regular Sunday breakfasts, he is surprised to find the blond there already. Naruto usually couldn't peel himself out of bed until well past sunrise on his day off. A half-empty mug of tea sat in front of him, and his eyes were tired in a way that spoke more to heartbreak than it did a sleepless night. Sai made his way to their regular table and sat, waving the waitress over as he did so. He made his order quietly, before turning back to study the quiet young man in front of him.  
  
Their relationship had not always been so . . . easy. They had both paid in blood and sweat and tears for the peace between the two of them. They still had a tendency to escalate things beyond what was necessary - Sai was absolutely incapable of not teasing Naruto, and Naruto was absolutely incapable of not taking the bait. Sakura had eventually refused to heal the many bruises and contusions they gave one another simply because they were "being dumb boys". But what they had between them was something good.  
  
Sai was finishing his second cup of tea before Naruto spoke.  
  
"I woke up from a bad dream this morning." His voice was rough and weary, and he didn't look at Sai when he spoke. Sai wasn't offended - when Naruto hit these moods where Sai was the only one he could speak to like this, he never met his eyes. Sai waved the waitress over to fill their mugs again - Naruto's had long gone cold - and they sat together quietly. After a long moment, Naruto took a sip from his mug. Sai watched him carefully before speaking.  
  
"You've had dreams before." Sai stated, matter of fact and steady. Naruto met his eyes for a bare second before nodding disractedly. He turned to stare out the window at the street running alongside the tea house.  
  
Warm sunlight was streaking through the streets of Konoha, and its residents were getting up and moving for the day. The light filtering through the window painted Naruto in a pale gold. Sai's fingers itched toward his sketchbook.  
  
It wouldn't be the first time he'd sketched Naruto - he had whole books devoted to Naruto's every expression, even one that had put Sai in a moment of accidental voyuerism (Sai had absolutely made a copy for Sakura. She'd punched him so hard he felt his spleen against his ribcage, but Sai knew she kept it in a drawer in her room.)  
  
His reach for his sketchbook was aborted when his eyes came to rest on Naruto's. Something about them was just, so very sad. It felt too private to look at even in person. Sai turned his gaze down to the tea in his cup. Naruto made a soft noise in the back of his throat, drawing Sai's attention again. Naruto was looking at him, but Sai wondered if he was really seeing him in that moment.  
  
"This dream was different." Naruto's voice was the private timbre of a man in mourning. Sai couldn't quite explain why it made him feel so sad.  
  
"How do you mean?" Sai asked him, softly. Naruto's mouth tipped down at the corners, and the beginnings of a fierce frown built between his eyebrows. He sipped from his cup and turned his blue eyes back to the street outside.  
  
"This time, I dreamed that he died there in that desert." Naruto admitted. Sai felt the smallest frown crease his face. It had been months since they'd seen  _him_ , nearly a year and a half since that encounter in the desert. Sai hadn't known it weighed on Naruto still. He wondered what else he didn't know about the man he'd come to call friend.  
  
"I am sorry." Sai said, after a long moment of quiet, and he was. Books had taught him to fake emotions, but Naruto taught him the weight of them. The way they lingered when they were real. The way they ached in your jaw, or under your tongue. The way sometimes words fell short. Naruto nodded anyway, the slightest dip of his head. Sai watched the crown of riotous blond hair as Naruto searched for his words.  
  
"She held me, when she woke up, and she told me she loved me." Naruto laughed softly, and if it was a little more forced and sad than necessary, Sai neglected to mention it. Sakura and Naruto had been  _something_ for a long time, longer than either of them thought but perhaps less than Kakashi might have said. He had no doubt that Sakura did love Naruto. But Naruto wasn't finished speaking, so Sai waited. If there was anything Sai was good at, it was waiting for Naruto to finish speaking. "It wasn't enough."  
  
The words were helplessly bitter. Angry, but not at Sakura. Naruto's eyes were squeezed tightly shut, his hand wrapped so tight around the teacup that Sai was beginning to fear for its safety. He watched Naruto for a long moment before reaching across the table between them. He rested his hand on top of Naruto's, gentle and quiet. The blond man in front of him shuddered, tired and worn and so very sad. Sai swallowed back the empty platitudes he'd learned.  
  
"I'm sorry." He said, simply, quietly. Naruto let go of the teacup only to clasp helplessly at Sai's hand instead. Sai wondered if Naruto knew how much he looked like a man lost at sea. Naruto heaved in a deep breath, and Sai ignored the dampness on his lashes.  
  
"I know, I know." He laughed, but it sounded more like crying than anything else. "Me too."  
  
The two of them sat that way, in silence, for a long time. Sai thought about speaking several times, but he didn't know what he should say. He wasn't sure what he  _could_ say. The tea left in both of their cups was cold when Naruto finally let go of Sai's hand, but his voice was a little stronger when he spoke again.  
  
"I do love her. I always have." Naruto said, his voice sure and unflinching. Sai watched his face carefully, nodding just the smallest amount. He could never judge Naruto for his affections for  _him_ , not when compared to the ghost of the brother he carried around.  
  
"I know. She does too." Sai was absolutely sure of that. He managed the barest hint of a smile as he met Naruto's eyes again. "You just love him more."  
  
Naruto didn't answer him, but he didn't need to. Sai knew very well what it meant that Naruto looked so shattered when he thought about  _him_. It was another long moment before either of them spoke.  
  
"I'm going to bring him back." Naruto said, firm and strong and proud. Sai tilted his head just slightly to the side. Naruto would never know how deeply the people around him believed in him when he spoke like that.  
  
"I know." Sai said, and he did. He absolutely did. "He does not deserve you."  
  
Naruto's smile was soft and just the tiniest bit sad when he answered. "I know." And he did. "But I'm not letting him go again." Naruto reached across the table, squeezing Sai's hand when he offered it to him.  
  
"Thank you, Sai." There was a lot that Naruto had not said in those few syllables, but Sai had always been able to read between the lines. Sai squeezed Naruto's hand in return. The blond excused himself then, waving goodbye with a bright smile that reflected nothing said in the last half hour. Sai sat for a moment longer before yanking his sketchbook from his bag. He sketched hurriedly, filling the page with the upturned corners of a bright smile and messy stretches of bright blond hair.  
  
And all across Konoha, there was the growing sound of children's laughter, like the bright fluttering sound of hope.


End file.
